Friends Award and 32 Week US

I'm a little slow on getting this up, but appreciative nonetheless!!

I received the Friends Award from Martha and Are You Kidding Me. I feel so loved!

Here's my eight friends I'd like to forward to (sorry if there's repeats!). Just send the award to 8 of your friends!

Wade and Erika

Are you Kidding Me

Kristin O

Leslie Lane

Jen

Virginia

Faith

And Anyone Else who Happens to Read this blog!

On a slightly different note, we had our 32 week OB appt and ultrasound. Got to see Lady Bug in 4D! It was awesome. Although, the umbilical cord was in front of her face which made her look like she had huge Angel.ie Jol.ie lips. I'm talking HUGE! She definitely didn't get those from me. Lipliner has been my friend for a very long time.

She is a big girl. They estimate she's at 4 lbs 7 oz. Already! And we've got eight (gulp!) weeks to go. So...they're thinking somewhere in the 8.5 pound range. Whew. That's big. But then again, we're not slight people. BigB is 6'2" and quite broad (with a head the size of Texas, to boot). I'm 5'8" and "sturdy" as I like to describe myself.

While the tech had the probe thingy on my belly, Lady Bug gave it a huge kick. The tech's hand literally bounced into the air. She said she didn't think she'd ever had a baby kick that hard before. Yeah! We've got a feisty one on our hands!

Then the Doc came in and said she was "very healthy" and that I should focus on eating protein and drinking water. Hmmmmm. Does that mean he knows my obsession with all things baked and bread related? I suppose he's right. Delivering a watermelon doesn't sound like fun. Although, I read somewhere that having a big baby is good because they practically crawl out.

Our bi-polar weather has swung to sunshine this afternoon. Yay! It was grey and rainy this morning and yesterday, 70 on Tuesday. Just plain crazy. But, like I always say, if you don't like the weather in Seattle, just wait an hour and it'll change.

Moment of Truth

I was such a wreck today. But dang, I got a lot of work done. It's amazing what you can plow through when you're trying to stay busy to keep your mind occupied. By the time 3 o'clock rolled around, I could hardly walk - my knees were shaking so badly.

Big B met me at the Drs office. We had to wait in the exam room for 15 minutes before the doc came. It's pretty humbling sitting on an exam table, naked from the waist down, in front of your husband. "Dontcha think this look is sexy? Would you like me to wear one of these at home?"

The doc came in and she was in a black suit. The kind you wear for a job interview. Ummm...where was the white lab coat? It was totally disconcerting. I felt like I should be pontificating my weaks and strengths as she got busy with the magic wand. I made myself look at that looming screen. I needed it to be over with. And, wouldn't you know, there was a little blinking light. A heartbeat. I'd heard about it - but never seen it. It was truly unbelievable. I sat dumbfounded as she poked around and determined that everything to appeared to be in the right place, the right size, and the right rate. There were no tears, just disbelief. "b-b-b-but I haven't had any symptoms in five days!", I stammered. "Oh, I hear that all the time. Just wait a few days." She handed me a little printout of the tiny little bean and told me to go see an OB in three weeks. I think Big B had to put my pants back on for me and lead me out of the office. Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow. I just keep saying that, over and over.

Can we just skip tomorrow?

I have totally worked myself into a frenzy. My first ultrasound is Wednesday afternoon. I have convinced myself that we aren't going to see anything. My symptoms have diminished - hardly any nausea, less twinges and pings in my uterus. Boobs are still hurting - but not as horribly, either. And, yes, I know that not everyone has symptoms, and they change from day to day, blah blah blah. But I feel different than a week ago.

I pretty much laid on the couch all weekend and did nothing. Just slept and watched horrible movies. I'm totally depressed. Of course, my close friends and family have been through this with me before, so they aren't so ready to jump on the, "it's going to be just fine" bandwagon. I think they think the worst, too. And Big B doesn't want to even entertain the idea, let alone talk about it.

I am dreading tomorrow's appointment. I don't want to go. I've been bursting into tears at random, and can just imagine what tomorrow will bring. Big B says to imagine the best case scenario, not the worst. I wish I could.